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He Said, She Said


1
On 1 of our regular walks at the local park, I enviously spied the inwards dearest couples of all ages snuggled on picnic blankets, eating, reading, or only existence together. H5N1 pipage dream for a raise of toddlers who won't sit down even thus for to a greater extent than than 2 minutes. After passing 1 specially unopen older couple, I turned to my married adult man together with said dreamily, "That volition move us inwards 20 years." Serious faced, he replied, "I promise not. That was 2 women."

2
My sis latterly went out amongst a grouping of friends. The girls inwards the grouping were already unopen friends, the guys were to a greater extent than casual acquaintances. After existence at a bar for awhile, the guys tried to instruct the girls to produce a shot. The girls preferred to sip their drinks, but the boys persisted, saying, "Don't worry, nosotros got this!" Finally the girls relented, together with the boys went to the bar together with returned amongst the shots. Shots went down, together with and thus 1 of the guys said, inwards consummate seriousness, "That volition move $5.50." He proceeded to collect coin from each of the girls! After the fact, Liz said, "I guess past times 'we got this' they meant they would, literally, instruct them from the bar."  

3
My married adult man is thus sweet, ever concerned that the women inwards his life are getting plenty to eat. My sis came for a visit, together with he commented that she had lost approximately weight together with was getting also thin. That night, he offered to brand her a blended cocktail. He brought her the drinkable together with she sipped it. H5N1 foreign await passed over her face. She sipped again. Not wanting to move rude, she said, "Hmm, that's interesting, good, interesting..."  After she worked on the drinkable for a few minutes, married adult man asked, "Do yous gustation the cloak-and-dagger ingredient?" Hesitantly she asked, "Did yous seat butter inwards this drink?" His smiling said it all. "Butter my shake" has instruct an appear to betoken whatever complimentary attempts at fattening!

4
Since finals were finished, together with fourth dimension was abundant, my sis together with approximately girlfriends decided to hitting upward a Tuesday  college black at a Pittsburgh bar. The crowd was primarily guys. After waiting for person to instruct the trip the lite fantastic toe flooring going, the girls decided to starting fourth dimension things themselves. Their motility broke the ice, together with approximately of the guys started to brand their agency to the floor, fifty-fifty politely bespeak the girls if they could dance. The guy nearest my sis leaned inwards together with asked, "Are yous white, or are yous Spanish? Because yous await white, but yous trip the lite fantastic toe similar you're Spanish..."

5
Upon bespeak my missy H where she got her beautiful blonde pilus (neither my married adult man nor I convey blonde hair), she paused for a minute, together with and thus replied confidently, "Uncle Tony!"


Uncle Tony used to convey long hair.

Because nosotros can't convey a postal service amongst no pictures!

6
Often, to forbid attempts at negotiation, I volition tell my kids that nosotros are doing or non doing such together with such because Daddy said so. Since I produce this when he is away at work, whatever the ruling is, it has to stand. I realized that perchance I am over using this tactic when H said to me, "I don't desire to move the wife, I desire to move the boss!"







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